Bit Ten point Thrie - Celtics an' things

Afore we move ontil the Christians, it wud be a guid idea fur tae clear up a couple more things aboot the Celtics. In Bit Ten point Yin, Professor Wullie McIlveen went sum way taewards debunkin' a few o' the common misbeliefs that knack aboot, but he has asked me til add a few mair points o' information.

Celtic Myths an' the Like.

These were all writ doon by Monks, lang after the boys in the stories were deed, an' then revived in the late C19th by anaither o' the enemies o' the Ulster Scot - the Anglo-Irish. High falutin' folk such as Lady Gregory got all hot unner the bussle o'er the heid o' boys like Cuculainn, writin' doon the tales fur a wider audience as part of what becum knain as the Gaelic Revivin'. The ideas o' these Anglo-Irish were a big hit wi' folk, includin' Free State Archaeologits. Every time they hoked somethin' oot they said it wus the Celts whit burried it. Ballicks. Anyhow, Cuculainn was clearly a Loyalist, as kin be seen frae this histerical murial. Unusally it alsae appears to indicate that Super Mario is a member o' an illegal organisation.

Incidentally the Anglo-Irish folk proved thar hatred fur the Ulster Scot by signing an agreement in 1985 wi' Margaret Thatcher (milk snatcher), which sold all Ulster's Rivers doon tae the Free State, ah think.

DNA.

In Bit Fower Wullie McIlveen delt wi' sevral o' the DNA myths that are put aboot by Free State folk effectively provin' that everybudy was here befair the Celtics were even thunk on. Howiver since then there's bin a wile lat o' talk that haff the cuntry is descended frae yin Niall o' the Nine Hostages. Wullie his conducted his ain research wi wimmin in an aroun' the Saith Antrim area, an his wurked oot that Niall wud a' needed nine sausages tae father all them folk.

Niall an' his Sausages lived oan the cusp o' the Early Christian Period in Ireland, sae unusually fur 1690 we will hiv a seemless transition intae the nixt histry instawlment: Bit Eleven - Christians.

Transfer Pole

Oor last pole asked tae see who yid rather transfer yer vote til, a resoundin' victry fur Elmo aff Sesame Street. Now some oot thar wunnered at this unusal choice o' candidate, but thar wus method in oor madness. This pole proves ma lang held belief that a furry faced boy is mair likely tae git elected than a baldy boy. Thus Ah urge the DUP tae take note o' oor findins an promote Nelson McCausland fowerthwith.