Wednesday, 2 December 2009

American Presidents: Part Yin


Afore ah start, ah must apologyise fur a chronic lack o' posts an', by extension, Ulster Scots education o' late. Aside frae a calender ah've done ballick awl, an this is awl attributed fur til wurk. Ah hate the existence o' wurk, but hiv yit tae fine someyin daft enough fur tae pay me til screed shite in Ulster Scots. Here's fur hopin'. Thus taenicht ah trawled ma half writ things an' discovered thit in yin o' ma mair drunken moments ah decided fur til embark oan a histry o' American type Presidents frae the wurld o' Americae. Thy'on'll haf til dae fur the noo.

American President Nummer 1: Gearge Washingtin

Yin thing the Free State Folk cannae take away frae the Ulster Scot is thit we invented Americae. Ivrythin' aboot Americae came frae here, we foun'ed awl its states, wun awl its wars, grew awl its fuid, invened maist o' its things an' bred maist o' its laiders. In fak jist aboot everythin excep' Vietnam an' John F Kennedy (who nat oany near as so started a wurld war but gat hissel shat oan by a librarian) kin be put doon tae the Ulster Scot. Thus taenict we unveil a braw new segment in 1690: USA - Ulster Scots o' Americae. Ah've set messel up tae prove thit ivry single American President came frae Ulster Scots stock (excep' JFK fur obvious raisons) sae taenicht we begin wi'......

Part Ah: President Gearge Washingtin

"Washingtin?" yis cry, surely he wus Inglis, in fak, isnae thar an Inglis toon by that very name! How kin ye passibly wurk oot thit he wis an' Ulster Scot" Usin the power o' lateral thinkin', an' Guinness, ah hiv bin formulatin proof......

  • Maybes thar is a Washingtin in Ingland, ah say, but thar is alsae a "Washing Bay" near til Cookstown. Ah've niver bin thar, but the name always struck me as odd. Wis it, perchance, some kindae strange place where by yid wash a truck oor a tractor? Sae a googled it (jist noo oan the hoof) an it turns oot thait it is a real place. Ah further researched an' foun' oot thit Bay is an ancient Ulster Scots wurd mainin' "Heavy Weicht". Perhaps as heavy as a ton? Makin Washington*
  • Washingtin famously said "If defeated everywhere else, I will make my stand for liberty among the Scots-Irish in my native Virginia". Whit is oft left oot o' the quote is "by which ah main' Ulster Scots, nat the o'er sort, in case yid git mixed up".
  • The hole constitution wis writ by boys frae here. The original preamble o' the furst draft raid....... "We the Folk of the United States, in Order til farm a mair perfec' Union, establish Justice, ensure domestic pace, provide fur the commun defence, promote the genral Welfair, an' secure the Blessins o' Liberty til arseselves and oor Posteriors, dis ordain an' establish thy'on auld Constitution fur the United States o' Americae, so we do."
  • Apparently it wis oany by the intervention o' yin o' the German delegates thit they drapped "Ye boy ye" frae the preamble. They evetually agreed fur til use Inglis, rather thin Nazi, as their Language. This is an oft furgat compromise, fur maist o' the constitutional convention boys stuck "Portavogie Scots" in the box fur langwidge o' choice.
  • This picture, ah hope, will dispel any lingerin' doubts aboot Gearge's Ulster Scots Ancestry, crossin' thy'on river wi' his fleg helt high. Ye kin almaist here him call oot "'Bout ye Inglis folk! Nae Surrender til yis!"

* This bit micht be made up**

** In fak iverythin' is maist likely made up, but ah'm nat sure, fur ma research is hardly whit yid cawl, extension.


pippakin said...

I tried but I'm obviously too English to understand more than the occasional word.

Translate into English or not its up to you

Professor Billy McWilliams said...

Putt aon an accent, an' raid it slowly.

See here....

Ah hiv til admit, ah wis richt an pished when ah writ it, sae its richt an broad.

Professor Billy McWilliams said...

Yer richt actually, ah cannae unnerstawn it messel.