|Magdalena, she's the yin in the middle.|
Nae naminations: The Alliance dinnae put photies oan their information aboot candidates bit o' their wabsite, an' Ah cannae be arsed lookin' them all up. Insteid they gie us whit appears tae be a cut an' paste frae a wurd document, wi' nae information whitsaeiver. They dae hiv 7 weemen standin' so by the law of averages* at laist one o' them might be wurth a jive, but a lack o' photies mains they are ruled oot o' the race.
* Law o' averages re Norn Iron weemen states thit fur every 7 wimmin ye meet 1 will be a Bible weildin' Christian wi' scary eyes, 3 will be slappers wi' neck tattoos an' mad shoes, 2 will be the size o' Belgium an' 1 will be wurth a coort.
|Wee Michelle, wi a fleg.|
Incidentally Ah cannae provide any links here, fur the DUP wabsite has the same address fur every page. Ah amnae tae sure how they dae it, an' wudnae want til accuse them o' bein' control freaks or the like.
Inexplicably the Shinners hivnae updated their wabsite since the Free State elections, sae Ah cannae really consider the full list o' hens stannin' but Ah did pass an election poster fur Michelle O'Neill the o'er day, an' thunk til messel, "Ah micht, even if she is the o'er surt." She saims like a dacent auld spud, mad fur canals an rural things, so Ah can imagine long walks in the country, where she says things like.... 'The need for a locally accountable democratic assembly which reflects the views of the indigenous population in its policy making, is a necessity for the people
of the six counties," an' Ah say, "Richt pet, whit's fur ma tay?"
Thosuns o' yis oot their whit hiv bin fallyin' this shite fur a lock o' years will be aware thit Ah hiv lang syne carried a torch fur Iris Rabinson. In ma watery eyes, she wus the epitomy o' Ulster weemenhood, beautiful, yet stern, intelligent, yet mad as a box o' hammers. Howiver, she has been replaced in ma affections by the delectable Lesley Macaulay, UUP candidate fur Aist Londonderry. Turns oot she's married, but nathin' is insurmountable til the concerted efforts o' a stalker like messel. Ah try til stay palitically neutral, but wud quite happily affer til canvass wi' young Lesley roun' the rural roads o' the Nairth West, perhaps stappin' til pick flowers an' skip beside a wee burn. She'd hiv til drive mind ye, fur Ah wud want the odd pint, though Ah suppose she cud hiv a poke in a layby.
A pole has been provided fur yis til choose the object o' yer affections, an' afore yis get oantil me, this is nat sexist, there is a serious point aboot weemen's participation in Ulster pailitics tae be made, but nat by me. Ah wud dae a Lovely Man Election Competition, but they're all brute ugly.