Saturday 25 May 2013

Sort it out Coca-Cola


Dear Coca Cola

I had occasion to be in Tesco Banbridge yesterday and was looking at getting one of your bottles with folk's names on them. I searched through the rack and was shacked to observe that nearly all the names were Free State names in the Irish language, such as Siobhan, Cian, Orla, Aoife etc, with very few names that would traditionally be viewed as from the Protestant culture, for example Billy, Sammy, Myrtle, Lily, Elizabeth, Edward and Basil.
 
As I'm sure you are aware Northern Ireland has very strict equality legislation and although I haven't bothered looking it up yet I'm pretty sure this kind of thing would break it. I am going to get on to my MP about it, but thought I'd give you a chance to sort it out before I do. Last year was our Queen's Jubilee after all. 

I await your response with interest.

Love
Professor Billy McWilliams
xo

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Prafassar

I am like unemployed at the mamant and its a bot like being a Guest o'Her Majesty wi none of the benefits lik free TV wi na licence and 3 square meals a dae.

So ah was thinking o going bak tae work in a manner o spaking

I hir thats them jabs ye can get in the Hause o'Lairds in Lonnon and where ye just ask questins all day and folk gae ye money fur daeing it. I am a fair han at thon questining thiong and i have bin practising even mair.

Hae ye ainy idea how ye land wan of them wee posts and wahts the moolah lik. Wee Rab dawn the Fife n Drum Bar was saying ye can get £500 a day fur it but I dinnae belive that.

jadis said...

In your list of good Protestant names, you make no mention of Heather. Or are you and Tesco assuming that all ladies of a certain vintage will restrict ourselves to Barr's Dandelion and Burdock?