- Anti-Free State Google: This campaign is goin' full tilt. Efter screedin' til Google fur til point oot thar lack o' parity o' esteam in creatin' a Gaelic Google thing but nae Ulster Scots, oor braw new sarch ingine - Hoke Oot - was created til univeral acclaim.* Thus far we hiv ansered 14 queries - thit's 14 thit dindnae gae tae Google. Ah hivnae done the sums, but a reckon if this continues at the present rate o' growth Google will be bankrupt at some point later oan.
- Git Big Ian oantil the Sir Terry Wogan Breakfastin' show. We escreeded til the BBC bit they hivnae gat back til us. Ah am fur refusin til listin' til Radio Twa until they rectify this anamoly. This limits me til Highland Radio, fur the reception's wile bad roun' here.
Aulder raiders micht recall thit back in July Mrs McWilliams caused severe damge til the enviroment threw the purchase o' a new motor. As a result we were left wi' her auld yoke, which lay oot the back til the o'er day when ah finally tuk messel til make a effort fur tae git rid o' it. Ah thus moved it roun' the front an' made a "Fur Sale" sign an' stuck it in the front windae.
Normally this wud cause nae grate ructions in oor part o' the country, but unfortunately it coincided wi' the Eighth Annual Artigarvan Supermodels Convention. Now purty gurls thesuns may be, but they entirely miscontrued the message "Fur Sale" an' lit at oor door in huge nummers either fur the protestin' or the purchasin o' pelts. Ah didnae knaw whare til luk fur some o' them wur wearin' next til nathin' an' thar heels cudnae hannle the muck. Howiver as luck wud hiv it we wur able til gid rid o' the motor, fur Kate Moss was oan the luksee fur an auld yoke fur towin' her black faced yos..