Monday 19 October 2009

Ballyhalbert, a heartfelt tributary.


Arts an' Culture.

Normally ah screed this brock messel, but the nicht ah give the Blog o'er til a special poem writ in support o' the Ballyhalbert Facebuk Campaign............

ODE TO BALLYHALBERT


Oh Ballyhalbert, you were ever so boring
You had no pubs and your folk were quite queer
But now you just rock, because of the whoring
That goes on most evenings down at the pier

Took a dander one night, ‘long your fine fetid beach
Amongst the big rocks and the old used condom
Thought to myself, there’s a lesson here to teach
About flipping the bird to the guys in London

What better place tell me, can showcase the UK?
When it's not about football, nor Blair, nor John Major
And it's not about artfests, nor culture, nor pay
Cos it's more about smack and our pregnant teenagers

So let’s do this now, and do it for the locals
Who've suffered so long, and suffered enough
We've had our fair fill of watching the yokels
Star in their movies, that are verging on snuff

It's time for you now to take up your place
Not always a King, but a consort - Prince Albert!
Leave your sisters alone, and get into the race
And put on the map your fine Ballyhalbert

The fine wurds o' Crawford..........

Genius ah'm sure yi'll agree. Git oantae it publicity mawn..........

5 comments:

Manuel said...

wonderful words.....sure to move the heart of a European bureaucrat....

Old Knudsen said...

You are a true warrior poet and piss head it would be my privilege to share spit in the shower with you as we did in the Scots Greys.

Fat Sparrow said...

"You had no pubs and your folk were quite queer"

Odd, I've never heard of a place with queers yet no pub. Ballyhalbert is truly something special, then.

Anonymous said...

You should have that put to music, it would make a lovely anthem.

the blow-in said...

There was the Ship Inn as I recall - but that was a fair wee wile ago...