Eurovision Arse Contest (Agin)
The mair observent o' yis will hiv noticed that ah hiv deleted oor post backing Genial Jim Allister in the next election. Yin o' oor Europe Funders taeday pointed oot that oor fundin' cud be at risk if we continue til interfere in palitics, partikularly o' the Euro kind. That an the fak that ma braither pointed oot that Jim is a barrister an' micht sue the arse clean aff us if we mak stuff up. Nat that it was made up, if ye ken? Apologies tae awl, we shall hencefowerth be purely histerical an' kultural.
Which brings me til this weeks pole.
In the end yis voted fur clatter o'er rake, but yis were wrang, although ah hiv til admit that there his bin sum debate in the 1690 boordroom o'er this. Basically the Ulster Scots sistem o' measurements is loosely based oan the auld Imperial system, nain o' the European metric brock (that is nat a palitical comment, fundin' man.)
It can be summed up as fallies
Yin Wheen = Twa and 3/4 bits.
Yin lock = Fower Wheens - yin bit.
Yin Clatter = Thrie and a haf locks + a wheen
Yin Rake = a wile lock o' clatters.
Thus a rake is the biggest measure.
Interestinly if ye add up the sum o' 4 wheens, 2 locks, a clatter and haf a rake an' divid the anser by a lock ye get 3.14. A useful nummer in big sums, potentially provin' that Ulster Scots invented pie.
Ah near furgat aboot a new pole - this yin luks at speed.